Shut The Fuck Up Amber Ale Extract Beer Recipe Kit
boomchugalug.com
Just Shut Your Fucking Face and Drink This!
What does this beer taste like?
(I don't know if I can read this. Those Boomchugalug people use bad swear words, and they're obviously uncultured and vulgar. Frankly, I'm offended. They must not be corporate stiffs, and I like corporate stiffs, so I'm going to order a Shirley Temple recipe from Amazon because I think soul-sucking corporations should get all the business.)
Shut the Fuck Up Amber Ale Extract Beer Recipe Kit is an American-style amber ale with a medium-bodied and smooth mouthfeel. It has a balanced taste with a malt sweetness that provides notes of caramel and toffee, which are complemented by mild hop bitterness and floral hop aroma, making it a desirable choice among beer drinkers who can't shut their fucking faces.
RECIPE SIZE: 5 GALLONSThis beer is dedicated to all of those folks who've never learned the social art of how to be quiet. Oh hell, who are we kidding? These characters will continue to blather until either your head explodes or you can somehow plug their pie holes. And though the thought of "sticking a sock in it" sounds tempting, it most likely has legal ramifications, so why not offer these babbling buffoons a beer? And what better a beer than Shut the Fuck Up Amber Ale? This amber beauty will match the color of your complexion as you endure their endless ramblings, but this fine ale's malty, caramelly smoothness, and the delectable interplay between the floral and citrusy hops will pacify your nerves as their flapping lips seem to fade into the distance. And remember, if you can't get them to shut their mug, just say, "How about a nice frosty mug of Shut the Fuck Up Ale?
All About American Amber Ale
If you feel like this is too long to read, then tell us to shut the fuck up.
The American Amber Ale is a modern American craft beer style that is amber to coppery-brown in color, hoppy, and moderately strong, with a malty caramel flavor, though the balance between malt and hops can vary. The hop aroma and flavor are typically from American or New World hop varieties, which can have citrusy, floral, piney, resinous, spicy, tropical, or berry-like characteristics. The maltiness can range from moderate to high, and usually has a moderate caramel character, sometimes with toasty or biscuity notes. The bitterness is moderate to high, and the finish is medium to full yet dry, and alcohol levels range from 4.5% to 6.2% ABV.
The style originated as a variation from American Pale Ales, and was popularized in the hop-loving regions of Northern California and the Pacific Northwest before spreading nationwide. The style differs from American Pale Ales by being darker, more caramelly, fuller-bodied, and more balanced towards malt than hops. It also differs from American Brown Ales by having less chocolate and dark caramel flavors.
American Amber Ale is brewed with pale ale malt, medium to dark crystal malts, and sometimes other specialty grains. American or New World hops are used for bittering, flavoring, and sometimes dry hopping. Neutral to lightly estery yeast is used for fermentation. Overall, these are easy beers to knock back a few, and no one is complaining about that. Except for the corporate stiffs.
